Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Reason for the Pirate moniker

No I am actually not a Pirate in the sense that you may find me hanging out at an amusement park joyfully singing about the Caribbean while hoisting a bottle of rum. You won't find the Keith Richard's character played by Johnny Depp, within me. I certainly don't jump around in leotards displaying my proud bulge (though many have accussed me of putting my prick first). I am not of the Errol Flynn swashbuckling type of Pirate. But I think Errol's pencil thin mustache probably helped him get laid.

I would describe myself as a Jimmy Buffett-type Pirate. I work hard. I play hard. Have a quirky sense of humor and have killed my share of brain cells. I hide behind my smile and my warped point of view. I am extremely opinionated and proudly wear my heart on my sleeve. I am far from being a conformist and have little patience with those who do. I give the finger to authority and I don't give a flying fuck what the rest of the crowd thinks. But mostly I enjoy life without hurting others. Now that I am in my mid-40s I light up less and often drink my diet coke straight. I cruise other blogs for a variety of reasons but most of all for entertainment.

Reasons to either dislike me or to rally with me:

I voted for both Bushes. I think the father is a noble and decent man and I believe the son's destiny was to clean up the mess the rest of us allowed the Clintons to leave behind. I admired Ronald Reagan from the beginning and long before they paraded his dead body around the USA for week. I find it humorous that his biological son is a goof ball liberal and his adopted son does more to carry on his legacy. I think Patty might be an exciting piece of ass. I think people like Michael Moore are war profiteers and are only playing the part of a desenter per Hollywood. I think people like Jesse Jackson are nothing more than snake oil salesmen capitalizing on ignorance and people's fears. I think the only reason there were so many "blue" states is because so many people are woried about being held responsible for themselves. There is a growing number of people in this country that believe that they are simply owed something by society just because they inhale the same air as the others.

I do not see any hypocracy in someone enjoying a fatty, having no problem with gay marriages, believing that Jesus Christ is the pathway to salvation, being compassionate for others and being Republican. I see no conflict in people who drive BMWs and SUVs, drinks Starbucks coffee, strokes their own domain, reads Stephen King and the Bible, prefers the Waltons over Survivor, and partakes in herbal bliss but denounces drug abuse or listen to Rush Limbaugh daily.

How do you feel about it?