The State of the Valsetz Church

I am so ticked right now. I had this long post about a conversation overheard between the President and the mayor of New Orleans and when I went to post. Blogger ate it. At least I think blogger ate it. It may be some kind of conspiracy where Dick Cheney and his minions are monitoring the blog world and when someone notices a blog that may be a little slanted or might make GW look goofy they eliminate it. Yeah that's it. A big conspiracy thing and all.


This is the church I went to as a kid. At least to "Vacation Bible School". My mom always thought it was a good idea to send us kids to church. Never mind mom and dad never went. It was good for us. There was a time they sent us both to Seventh Day Adventist, i.e. "Saturday church" and then to "Sunday Church". I always wondered why they wanted us out of the house on weekends. I think they were doing some missionary work of their own.

The funny thing about this church is it was more of a breeding ground for the teenage youth of Valsetz then it was a sanctionary for God. The parking lot to right of the building was always a famed parking location to swap spit and other bodily fluids as well as the wood shed out back.

As small and quaint as the church was it was the central part of the community at times. When one of the local kids got married, the Benediction for the senior class, or Boy Scout Awards night the church would fill up with most of the town, the majority being those who never stepped inside the church for any other reason then to attend a social event.

When I think of this place I always remember how out of touch I was as a kid. I actually told one of the most famous lies in that church. During one of the Vacation Bible School sessions we were given homework to do for the next day. The next day came and as they went around the classroom asking each kid for their assignment I panicked. When it got to me I did say it. I said "My dog ate it". I was only eight or nine. What did you expect? We had very little TV at the time and I had no idea that was one of most told lies.

The one thing I remember the most of the Vacation Bible School was every day Mrs. Jeske would ask us what songs we wanted to sing and I always shouted out, "Onward Christian Soldiers". What a great song for ADHD-type of kids like me. It sounded so kick-ass.

Later in college I told a professor why I had missed a class assigment the excuse was my Grandmother had died. Incidentlly, she is 91 years old as I write this. I just was never good at that type of thing. But I am a kick-ass Christian soldier though.