Bonner's Ferry II

My last two days in Bonner’s Ferry were more eventful. In Bonner’s Ferry the best place to stay or should I say the motel that is most livable for an extended visit is the Indian casino. Though I rarely gamble it was the only motel with a restaurant and lounge. The next to the last night there I decided that I would try the prime rib they had been boasting since I arrived. The restaurant was packed so I had to wait at the bar. As I worked my way through my second Fat Tire ale I noticed a very sparkly-eyed elderly woman eating while her surrounding dinner companions argued the Potato Famine of Ireland. I watched the table as the three companions of the woman debated the nutritional value of the tuber and gave little attention to her as she worked her food into bite size morsels then shoved them into her mouth.

I chuckled a time or two thinking of various scenarios for the dinner for four when I realized the elderly woman was choking. She began to turn red and saliva began pouring from her mouth. She began to try to fish out whatever was obstructing her airways with her fingers. The folks at her table paid no heed and continued their debate.

I began to wonder what the heck should I do? Should I sit here and just ignore the old lady until she keels over? Should I go tell them? I couldn’t take it anymore and she looked even more desperate. I ran over to her table and told the man seated next to her that it appeared that she was choking. He turned and asked his mother if she was all right. She shook her head no and he then bolted out of there. He ran from the table saying he was going to go call 911. I squatted down next to the woman and asked her if she was choking, she nodded her head that she was.

I put one hand up under her breasts and the other on her back and gave her a mighty squeeze. Plop, up came a broccoli stalk. At first I thought I had pushed her guts out. The two women sitting across the table from her could only say, “Oh, mother what are you doing?” Neither of the two got up from their seats.

Then another woman came running up to the table giving out instructions; she just happened to be a nurse who was having dinner at another table. We were able to get the elderly woman relaxed and breathing again. When her son returned, he was still in a frazzle telling us that he had just called for an ambulance. Then a calm came over the place and we all settled down.

I went back to the bar and finished my Fat Tire and ordered the prime rib. On the way out the elderly woman came by where I was sitting and asked to talk to me. Leaning against her walker she told me with a sparkle in her eyes and joy in her voice that she thought she was going to choke to death on her 91^st birthday and I helped her have a good birthday after all. I gave her a Pirate hug and told her it was my pleasure and she should have a great birthday and forget about the lousy food.

As she left with her posse, I thought how weird it would have been to live that long and die choking to death on your own food while your family debated the nutritional value of the potato. I also thought how I had debated with myself prior to coming to the restaurant for dinner, instead of ordering room service.